The Security Benevolent Helpline
The Worshipful Company of Security Professionals

Relationships

Relationships are the key to success in all facets of life and their quality determines our sense of happiness and fulfilment.

A good relationship means different things to different people. It includes those in the workplace between employer and employee, in schools and colleges between teacher and pupil and the important relationships between friends and families.

Certain ‘ingredients’ are essential for a long term and satisfying relation.

These include:

  • Appreciation – remembering to praise and say ‘thank you’.
  • Having open and honest communication.
  • Trusting in the other person or party.
  • Sharing aims and interests.
  • Sharing responsibilities.
  • Having good problem solving, negotiation and coping skills.
  • Being able to compromise and not over reacting to trivial issues.

Relationships with other people have a great impact on our life. Developing and maintaining a relationship is a commitment, which if it goes wrong, can affect both our mental and emotional well being.

Good relationships need effort and nourishment and bad ones need action. Misunderstanding and the lack of communication are the basis for problems between people.

Each and anyone of us may need assistance at some time to help to confront and overcome a problem.

  • Try to assess the problem, work out and ask exactly what is wanted, and the reasons why. It can be helpful to write everything down.
  • Take time to listen carefully to the other point of view and ask questions to ensure you understand this point of view.
  • If feelings run high wait until everything has calmed down before tackling the issue. Remember you won’t always agree on everything.
  • Blame or insults are not helpful.
  • Make every effort to understand how a situation may appear to another, and accept that there are differences in ideas and expectations. These differences may at times lead to conflict and strong emotions.
  • If an issue cannot be settled, table it for a later, specific and agreed upon time.

All good relationships are based upon trust and mutual respect. When this trust is lost relationships can be hard to rebuild.

If you have tried everything above and still need further help please contact one of the agencies listed below.

Help with Family Relationships

RELATE

NATIONAL FAMILY MEDIATION

Domestic Violence and Abuse

If you are a victim of domestic violence or abuse don’t keep it a secret. Remember you are not alone and you do not have to tolerate abusive behaviour. Talk to someone you trust or contact one of the organisations listed below.

WOMEN’S AID

SAMARITAN’S

Workplace Relations

ACAS (Advisory, Conciliation and Arbitration Service)

The Security Benevolent 24 Hour Confidential Helpline for members of the security profession only.

If you would like to talk, in confidence, to one of our counsellors please phone 0800 316 0201.